Issue 35 (July 2003)

                                                                         Issue 35, July 2003

                                            Haunting photos taken moments before disaster.

Editor’s letter
       It’s been a month of international jet-settery, celebrity touching, booze-fuelled nights out and playing lots and lots and lots of very good games.
       But as we spend most of the rest of the mag talking about the games, I thought I could waste this space telling you all about my new pals Arnie (yes, he is big, but not that big), Kristanna (she’s the new Terminator baddie and she’s bloody lovely), Jennifer Love Hewitt (I gave her a cuddle, she didn’t press charges) and, of course, Lara.
       Why are these people happy to have the likes of me mingle with them? Because – as you’ve always known and now everyone knows – playing games isn’t the (other) lonely bedroom pursuit for the friendless. Games are big business, they are culturally important and everyone and their mother is doing it. Which is no bad thing, you know. It really isn’t.
       And why is Lara acting like a snarling punk chick on the cover? ‘Cos we thought it looked bastard cool, that’s why.
                                                                Richard Keith, Editor

Features
Plastic Fantastic – Alter Echo.

#1. Six-Player Online. #2. No Car Damage. #3. Out This Christmas – Gran Turismo 4. Well, we got one of those things. Unfortunately, it was the one nobody likes.

Network Love at First Sight – Following on from last month’s soviet propaganda, the creative feature designs continue. Helen “Hels” Prior hosts this how-to comic strip for setting up online play.

Monthly Articles
Funny Nicknames – This month, reggae names.

“Oh Good Gawd!” – The worst promotional item and/or screenshot sent to the magazine. This month, a shaver.

Previews
Ghosthunter – “Ghosthunter combines the scare tactics of survival horror with puzzling and shooting gameplay. Like Madonna, it’s pretty scary at times, but undeniably attractive too.” Hot

Lord of the Rings: Return of the King – “Return of the King is already looking a lot better than The Two Towers, with more features, more characters and thrilling battle scenes that impressed us no end. Long live the king!” Boiling

Ratchet and Clank 2 – “Ratchet and Clank 2 could hardly fail to be promising – it builds on an already superb game with bigger everything. Sure it’s no revolution but look at these images and tell us you care.” Boiling

Conflict: Desert Storm 2 – “Conflict: DS2 promises to better its superb forbear by a long chalk with its intelligent, strategic, team-based action. A shameless cash-in on recent events? You know better than that…” Warm

Syphon Filter: The Omega Strain – “SF: Omega Strain is a close relation of the PSOne SF games, and we’re more than happy with that. Add PS2 power, an online element for replayability by the ship load and we’re looking at a huge hit!” Boiling

Resident Evil: Outbreak – “Resi: Outbreak could be the most exciting game of 2004. It looks great, it plays great and the co-operation adds an extra dimension to the classic gameplay. And there’s a year of development left!” Boiling

SSX 3 – “SSX 3 should be the leap that Tricky-ites have been asking for. The ‘one mountain’ structure works and the new challenges, tricks and characters really move SSX on.” Boiling

FIFA 2004 – “FIFA 2004 has everything in place to make a move on PES, especially with the added online attraction. But there’s plenty more for EA Sports to do before that November release.” Hot

Broken Sword: The Sleeping Dragon – “Broken Sword: The Sleeping Dragon is already demonstrating that Revolution has been spending its time well. Fluid controls, gorgeous graphics and top quality plot and puzzling await.” Hot

Amplitude – “Amplitude fever is unlikely to sweep the nation next month. This sort of game is usually ignored. But we can change that! Go out and buy this game when it’s released. You know you want to!” Hot

Updates for Rise to Honour, Backyard Wrestling, Deer Hunter, Zone of the Enders: The 2nd Runner, Beach Volleyball, Battlestar Galactica, Kya: Dark Lineage, NARC and Dynasty Warriors 4.

Reviews
Tomb Raider: The Angel of Darkness – “Croft addicts will revel in this drizzly monster. But is Lara tired? Let’s hope she perks up a little for our next date.” 8/10

Return to Castle Wolfenstein – “Only the high standards of the FPS competition prevent this from being a truly essential buy.” 8/10

Twisted Metal Black Online – “If you own the original TMB, this will be very familiar. If not, there’s great fun to be had… but it won’t last long.” 6/10

Virtua Fighter 4 Evolution – “Packed with things to do, VF4 still lacks the outright fun that makes Soul Calibur a game for everyone.” 8/10

Evil Dead: A Fistful of Boomstick – “Greater value than quality, but if you own Evil Dead 2 the game’s almost strong enough to stand on its own.” 6/10

Resident Evil: Dead Aim – “Engrossing action shooter that draws from the familiar Resi styles and fuses them together to stylish effect.” 7/10

Wakeboarding Unleashed Featuring Shaun Murray – “Fun and frothy, but slightly limited in scope and inevitably lies in the wake of its extreme sports big brothers.” 6/10

Futurama – “A likeable if unspectacular platform romp, given extra momentum by great characters and sharp gags.” 7/10

Tribes Aerial Assault – “Tribes has some entertaining elements, but is tiresome offline and fiddly. It just doesn’t make the grade.” 6/10

Clock Tower 3 – “A grisly horror title with some good ideas, damaged by lack of variation and a high level of frustration.” 5/10

Dark Chronicle – “If you’ve finished FFX and need a new fix, look no further. This is top-tier RPG fare, an essential purchase.” 9/10

Hulk – “Top fun for a while, but you’ll get bored of wading through an incessant stream of fist fodder.” 7/10

WWE Crush Hour – “Aimed at younger WWE fans, this budget-priced, spandex-clad spin on Twisted Metal just breaks even.” 5/10

World Championship Snooker 2003 – “Another feature-packed recreation of the sport from Codies marred only by a lack of graphical flair.” 7/10

Indycar Series – “A high-velocity, efficient and attractive take on the racing sim, but the tracks are damn boring.” 6/10

F1 Career Challenge – “At last, an F1 game that makes a priority of excitement and thrills over worthy but dull simulation.” 7/10

Cel Damage Overdrive – “This is no groundbreaker, but makes for some highly entertaining multiplayer deathmatch action.” 5/10

Black and Bruised – “Not funny enough, not clever enough, not anything enough. Expect to see this ‘pre-owned’ in a shop near you.” 5/10

Hardcore
Part 1 of the Enter the Matrix walkthrough and walkthroughs for Silent Hill 3 and Def Jam Vendetta, plus SOCOM: US Navy SEALs, SOS: The Final Escape, Rygar: The Legendary Adventure, Music 3000, The Simpsons Road Rage, Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, Tenchu: Wrath of Heaven, X-Men 2: Wolverine’s Revenge and Bloodrayne.

Disc Content
Playable Demos
SOCOM: US Navy SEALs
Alter Echo
Gunfighter 2: The Revenge of Jesse James
Jak and Daxter: The Precursor Legacy
Hitman 2: Silent Assassin
Twister Metal Black
Ico
Ratchet and Clank
WWE Smackdown! Shut Your Mouth

Footage
Dark Chronicle
Twisted Metal Black Online
Tekken 4: The King of Iron Fist Tournament – Footage from an international Tekken 4 tournament held in the UK, presented by Emily Newton Dunn. Israel's player wins, then goes on to dominate the game director 3-0 in the final match.

Trivia
* The big news this month is, of course, the long-awaited, long-delayed arrival of Tomb Raider… and it sadly fails to live up to the hype, unlike Metal Gear Solid 2, the other PS2 blockbuster that’s been hyped up since the PSOne era. This review is infamous for giving a high score despite the review text being mostly negative, and struggling to justify the score in the final paragraph. I get the impression that the reviewer knew deep down that the game wasn’t very good, but was in denial about it. Combine that with a competition to win a Lara Croft inflatable sex doll, and the cover ironically proclaiming “Never mind the bullshit, here’s the truth!” and it's funny in a sad way. (The clip's not sad though. That's all funny!) I’m being harsh here, so I’m willing to be nice and say that, aside from the heading, the punk-rock aesthetic on the cover does actually look pretty cool in all fairness.
* Onto non-Tomb Raider matters, this issue sees the first concrete word on PSP, which was officially revealed at E3 2003. The mock-up created by the team looks a bit like the Nintendo DS, but without a bottom screen.
* PS2 gets a price drop to £170 with a bundled game. The choices are “Ratchet and Clank, The Getaway, Primal, World Rally Championship 2, Formula One 2002 or, um, Kingdom Hearts.” Whaddya mean, um Kingdom Hearts?!? Surely a sports game that’s a year out of date is more deserving of a dismissive um?
* There are lots of new franchises debuting this month, including the controversial Manhunt, (which starts as it means to go on with a teaser website modelled after dark web snuff film sites... not that I would know, of course!), Forbidden Siren and Monster Hunter.
* The announcement of Shannon Elizabeth as the Bond Girl for 007: Everything or Nothing comes with a screenshot from American Pie. You’ll never guess which scene they went with!
* The Lord of the Rings preview promises a number of playable characters, “barring Gollum, who could hardly be expected to duff up cave trolls with his bony little fists.” Surprisingly, he’s playable in the Game Boy Advance version! Not that you’d want to play as him, because his attacks are very weak, he has low health and he can’t use equipment.
* WWE Crush Hour is the best idea for a crazy spin-off ever. Change my mind!
* Emma McFadden wrote in to Issue 32 asking for help with Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. This month she and her brother Andrew write in again to say thank you. Aw, bless!

Quote of the Month: “An enraged green mutant is crushing the sergeant’s head like a ripe watermelon. Suggest tactical retreat.” Hulk smash sergeant’s head!

Cover price: £5.49
Page Count: 146